Monday, March 31, 2008.
we watched the fireworks rain down over the lotus-shaped skyscrapers. you looked at me with heated eyes, and i remembered our fearless silences. staring out the window, no end in sight, just road and volcano, just fire and light.
(posted at 11:41 AM)
Sunday, March 30, 2008.
trapped somewhere between needing out and wanting in.
(posted at 8:31 PM)
Saturday, March 29, 2008.
i'm obsessed with soy ice cream
(posted at 7:07 PM)
Thursday, March 27, 2008.
hieu sent me this article. Dalai Lama vs. the brain surgeon on whether thoughts act back on the physical stuff of the brain to change its chemical, electrical and other physical properties.
"The Dalai Lama has long tried, through his teachings, to increase the world’s supply of compassion and empathy. This study suggests that compassion meditation might do that, Davidson said in a statement: “People are not just stuck at their respective set points” for compassion. 'We can take advantage of our brain’s plasticity and train it to enhance these qualities.'"
so, wait, you mean to tell me that my pessimism is probably not helping the state of things? ;)
(posted at 2:18 PM)
last night barrett accompanied me to Erato, the wine bar where milongas are held every wednesday night in st. louis. it was nice. tal was a good dancer, and i had to resist the wine selection because of my sore throat.i have the unfortunate luck of having a body that doesn't like to let me forget that i am not, in fact, invincible. now my project team thinks that i get sick easily. but seriously, moving between so many different geographic regions with different weather patterns? Body, i don't blame you for protesting.
i'm balancing on some kind of "attempt to push away from stagnancy." i won't let my heart feel anything but cynicism towards love. i don't sleep enough. i've neglected friendships. i appreciate the few people who don't mind that i'm not around; they still greet me as enthusiastically as ever when i finally appear in their lives again. i'm always exhausted, and the only things i force myself to make time for are dancing tango and attempts at running. this is my way of coping with heartbreak and restlessness, i guess. i run until i run out of breath, and then i run some more.
(posted at 9:10 AM)
Tuesday, March 25, 2008.
Aditi and I decided to try a Bolivian restaurant (whose name neither of us dared to pronounce). 
Give it a try, record yourself, and send it to me. Or just ask someone who knows and let me know.
The waitress addressed us in Spanish, which was refreshing. Aditi politely refused an English menu, even though I was staring at her in disbelief at the decision. Sure, I have an undergraduate degree in Spanish, sure, I lived in Spain, sure, I dated a Mexican guy for several years. Yeah but all that means nothing to the Bolivians. I didn't know 90% of the dishes described on the Bolivian menu. The waitress recommended the Moconchinchi for a refresco... I agreed because of the name. Reminds me of a Zumba song.
According to Bolivia Hoy,
M'OKONCHINCHI
It's a traditional refreshment done out of dry peaches. You can find it cold and at a low price in all the marketplaces and almost all the corners downtown.
We were very pleasantly surprised. It was really sticky-yet-refreshing sweet, and there was a dry peach at the bottom. I'm notorious for guzzling whatever beverage I have in front of me whatever the taste (except for beer, much to David's lament), and this was good. So if the horchata's not made right, I'd order one of these in a heartbeat.
(posted at 4:45 PM)
Monday, March 24, 2008.
i want to take my lenses for a run out on town.
(posted at 9:46 PM)
prefiero morir
a no estar contigo
no puedo vivir feliz
sin ti
porque si tu te vas
que va pasar?
veneno
veneno tu me das
mi lupita
no me dejes
jamas
how fitting that i would sit in my doorway wailing this song at you,
how fitting that while the sun peeked in between your venetian blinds and spilled itself onto your loft bed, you would whisper this song to me with "mi rosita" instead.
how fitting that when i'm grasping at something good i remember, this is the first thing i think of.
sometimes it makes me want to cry, but mostly...
there's you.
(posted at 9:40 PM)
iron chef america:morimoto vs. tyson cole, uchi founder, austin tx
i was at the gym on the treadmill and only got to watch 10 minutes of it, but i knew it was going to be good.
i was in love with how tyson handled the showdown, he seemed so respectful and humble. granted, i'm (slightly) biased at the fact that Cole founded Uchi, but i hear he put up a good fight.
(posted at 12:56 PM)
you would think that after doing it every week, going through airport security would get a whole lot easier. but it doesn't.(posted at 4:50 AM)
Friday, March 21, 2008.
i totally just ate half of the pint of Soy Dream Mocha Fudge that i bought upon arriving back in Austin. deliciously guilty. 
it's good to be home.
i visited aditi and we attended the DC Tango Marathon. it was such an amazing weekend.
i ate a lot of f*cking good food.
oh, and i bought a random dress.
oh and i got to dance. a lot :) jason's colgadas. dancing to apocalyptica's nothing else matters. the live music.
(posted at 12:34 AM)
Wednesday, March 19, 2008.
edit:isn't it funny, i wander to nyt and on the front page i happen to click on "So you want to be a blogging star?"
Mr. Cuban said: “Blog about your passions. Don’t blog about what you think your audience wants. Post because you have something you are dying to write about.”
---
for almost two years now, this blog has been under the radar. as in, i changed settings so that google search cannot find me. (if google can't find me, no one can find me, right? haha)
i decided to do this because i applied for a full time job and i had to be somewhat "professional"-- but let's face it. i'm still a kid, and i want to write about what i want to write about. yet i still have maybe 20-40 consistent readers who remember my URL anyways, (according to webstats), and i can't believe so many of you still take the time to occasionally care about what i post (of course i appreciate it a lot). so lately i've been pondering, what if i produce content that doesn't have to be kept under the radar?
problogger.net offers: SEO Tip: Almost 7 ways to re-optimize your posts
and
10 random reflections on SXSWi 2008.
i can't believe i "live" in austin and missed out on sxsw. AGAIN.
i'd love to buy a house in austin, set up a studio, and mush around ideas in my head for the rest of my life.
tango classic...
francisco canaro- poema
(posted at 6:21 PM)
"Today, though, the world has changed a lot, and the good fight has shifted from the battlefields to the fields within ourselves." - Paulo Coelho, The Pilgrimageso, i know i missed the boat a long time ago. elissa and i started blogging before the word "blog" was even invented. i could have changed my priorities and stopped fretting about School and Grades and Relationships, and focused instead on something like web design and blogging or dance or photography, and perhaps i would be somewhere by now. but i'm not. i have one of those "cushy office jobs" that isn't cushy at all. honestly, i think they call it cushy because that's what happens to your tush when you sit in a cube all day.
so do i actually need to think like a business-major-undercover-hippie? i need a plan. i have so many plans to do too many things.
i'm going to buy a house and fill it with photographs and quirky things. and drawings on post-it notes.
how 'bout them Houston Rockets?
(posted at 1:37 PM)
Tuesday, March 18, 2008.
due time for a music list post, might you say?ingrid michaelson- the way i am
thao nguyen- beat (health, life, and fire)
aimee mann- the scientist (coldplay cover)
she and him- why stay here
basia bulat- in the night
mirah- apples in the trees (check out the live version too)
mirah- credo cigalia
natasha bedingfield- pocket full of sunshine
arkestra one- i really want you
dawn landes- young folks
dawn landes- twilight
rihanna- is this love (bob marley cover)
los caparos- rasta vasily
matchbox 20- how far we've come
cassettes won't listen- paper float
art in manila- set the woods on fire
(posted at 5:10 PM)
the weather here in st. louis today reminds me of Texas. the warm spring rainstorms. i was walking underneath a bright blue umbrella to the office from the car, and suddenly i realized how happy i was that it was raining. it wasn't too cold, it wasn't snowing, there was no ice in my path. to a houstonian/austinite, these thunderstorms are home.(posted at 9:19 AM)
Monday, March 17, 2008.
on the way home from the friday night milonga at 6:30AM, our cab driver noted, "if you want to be a great lover, first you have to learn to be a great dancer."my deliriously tired brain delighted in his words.
(posted at 5:52 PM)
look what's new at Google Calendar! Syncing with Outlook!(posted at 2:22 PM)
at the eastern market on sunday, i picked up an old copy of Selected Poems by Cummings. i thumbed through the pages and wished that it didn't cost so much. aditi tried to bargain down for her Tofu Cookery cookbook and my e.e. cummings, to no avail.jason and bright both commented on my
i shall imagine life
is not worth dying if
(and when)roses complain
their beauties are in vain
but though mankind persuades
itself that every weed's
a rose roses(you feel
certain)will only smile
- e.e. cummings
----
i have found what you are like
the rain
(Who feathers frightened fields
with the superior dust-of-sleep. wields
easily the pale club of the wind
and swirled justly souls of flower strike
the air in utterable coolness
deeds of green thrilling light
with thinne
d
newfragile blues
lurch and.press
-in the woods
which
stutter
and
sing
And the coolness of your smile is
stirringofbirds between my arms;but
i should rather than anything
have(almost when hugeness will shut
quietly)almost
your kiss
- e.e. cummings
-----
Love is more thicker than forget
more thinner than recall
more seldom than a wave is wet
more frequent than to fail
It's most mad and moonly
and less it shall unbe
than all the sea which only
is deeper than the sea
Love is more always than to win
less never than alive
less bigger than the least begin
less litter than forgive
It's most sane and sunly
and more it cannot die
than all the sky which only
is higher than the sky
- e.e. cummings
(posted at 1:53 PM)
yeah, this weekend was kind of like that.
(posted at 11:30 AM)
Friday, March 14, 2008.
hey girls, i started counting calories, too. it lasted all of a week. i'm sick of feeling guilty about loving cookies.
listen to Eve Ensler.
"We focus on fixing our bodies. We spend $40 billion a year on beauty products. What if we actually took that money, took that time, took that energy and started fixing the world. Women would actually be in power."
"Good is towing the line, being behaved, being quiet, being passive, fitting in, being liked, and great is being messy, having a belly, speaking your mind, standing up for what you believe in, fighting for another paradigm, not letting people talk you out of what you know to be true."
"Doing this show (the Vagina Monologues) is really painful each time I perform it. The degree to which women hate their bodies is profoundly sad. Let's just put off our self-hatred for 10 years, take over the world, and then we can obsess again."
dammit, we only get one chance to live life. i can't believe how much time i, we, spend agonizing over this.
(posted at 12:23 PM)
once again, i need to introduce this quote."All my life, I thought of love as some kind of voluntary enslavement. Well, that's a lie: freedom only exists when love is present. The person who feels freest, is the person who loves most wholeheartedly.
It hurt when I lost each of the various men I fell in love with. Now, though, I am convinced that no one loses anyone, because no one owns anyone.
That is the true experience of freedom: having the most important thing in the world without owning it."
- Coelho
i met a man at the St. Louis airport while waiting for my flight, which was two hours late. he was from Austria, and now he lives in Chicago. He met his wife in Canada, and after three months, they eloped. he had to propose to her 4 times to get her to say yes. 15 year later, he has one regret. when they had their third child, he took off work a week to be with his wife at the hospital. he had meetings and deadlines scheduled the week after. his wife ended up going home with his newborn son on Monday, and he was unable to be the person who drove them home from the hospital. that is the one thing he would change if he could live his life again, he said. he would have said "to hell with all the meetings and deadlines and clients and work, i'm taking my wife and baby home."
i wanted to cry. i told him that very few men understand the emotional significance of something as "seemingly trivial" as a drive home. or just being there.
yeah.. they say it's hard to define love.
(posted at 11:28 AM)
Interview with Dana Frigoli and Pablo Villarrazaby Jackie Ling Wong
Scene: Pablo and Dana in Buenos Aires at their new studio DNI at 2140 Corrientes. Ronnie, who has agreed to help translate, Asa, and I arrive and go upstairs where workmen and Pablo are painting the walls and a mural of the school logo over the mirror.
Pablo is barefoot and a real sweetheart. Very intense and focused when he speaks... when he does anything. Dana is a bundle of energy with a ready smile and kiss for everyone. Both of them together, make an extraordinarily dynamic couple. They are two of my favorite teachers in BA and I was fortunate to take classes with them at El Pulpo's Festival which were well attended but small enough to receive individual attention and with plenty of room to move.
Dana hasn't arrived yet so we began with Pablo. The entire interview took 3 hours and no one was bored!
Q:You definitely have and teach a unique technique --- how did you develop it? What was the impetus?
Pablo: We first started to think about our own dance because we felt that it was uncomfortable... perhaps it was some detail that we noticed about how we walked or how we communicated with our body.
We (people) never think about how we walk because we were only one year old when we started walking...but when we start to dance, we change many things that are natural for us. For example, we embrace each other one way in life and then we change the embrace for the dance. We stop hugging and communicating with our bodies.
When people in general start to dance, there are obstacles that they put up that prevent natural movement. The older milongueros/as dance with so much heart... Unfortunately, these feeling are impossible to teach, so the young people had to try to interpret.
We felt we needed technique in order to learn to express ourselves. So we started investigating natural movement in order to achieve what we felt was missing from the old learning.
Q: Why aren't young people able to learn the same way that the milongueros/as did?
Pablo: I think that young people learn by looking at things because this is the age of imagery. I learned that way too, and I had to reeducate myself. I can become the image but the image has to have feeling. The image is only a part... like the drawing of what we want to present.
Q: I'm guessing that this is similar to discovering a person who looks great on the dance floor but doesn't feel good in the embrace.
Pablo: Image is structure and how you get that image is what you do inside. If a person is looking at an old milonguero, they have to codify what they are seeing. So Dana and I looked for a bridge so that we could show people how to achieve the feeling inside, between two people.
What we want to transmit is not the old style versus the new style. They dance Tango with their own visions. So the work we needed to do, was to codify what already existed and take all the information and put it into a new system and than relate it to the body.
Q: But how is it different for the new generation?
Pablo: Bodies are different and women have more roles in society. For example, Dana is a very active independent person. I can not say, "You do that... you do this".The result is a change in the dance. The dance of Tete is a wonderful way of dancing but it is his expression. We needed to find our own personal identity in the dance.
Today, my generation needs to relearn to feel. They have lost the most common feelings. Life isn't like something in a movie... it has to do with simple contact...with themselves and others. I knew the figures and forms but I needed to connect with Dana... wanted to make the two go together. So we started out by deepening our own communication and then looking for a way to show others how to connect more profoundly.
Dana is very intuitive... she naturally feels things ..all things...she makes easy connections and you see it in the dance as well. I was studying the form, movement but with her, I started thinking about movement in space and then Dana brought it down to a finer level. With the combination of our personalities, it just became totally different. We each brought something different to the dance, so we had to find a common language. Basically, our teaching technique uses language based on anatomy but the motivation is two people who want to communicate through a common language.
The old milonguero went out every night... dancing the Tango ...holding lots of different women, and he can't help but have certain feelings about these women. It's not a real life today to do what the old milongueros did. I envy their ability to stay out all night but is that the life I want?
Q: I know we were talking about the need for a new communication but why can't the youth of today learn the same way? Is it possible to learn by going out every night, dancing all the time?
Pablo: I have 3 points...
1. Society has changed - there are different people dancing today... with professional careers... so they have another life outside the dance. Also the milonga has changed... perhaps the milonga loses its mystique because of the changes. I don't know if it's good or bad. For example, people want to dance in big spaces. They want to express themselves, be more open. And there is another generation that wants to be close. So people will sometimes say."This is Tango" or "This is not Tango".
We dance mostly open but we don't want to reject the old style or be in conflict. This is very important because I don't want to make a distinction that this works... this doesn't work. To be able to have a dialogue with Dana - that's what is important.
For instance, women always had to close the legs. We think .. open your legs.. express yourself. It used to be that the man defined everything. Today, he creates a space for the woman to be beautiful. He decides the space, and rhythm and the women make it beautiful.
2. The dialogue with the other people as the spaces change. There's a difference in what you can express in a class vs. a milonga. In class we keep adding things... but in a milonga, you take out ... select... filter...and explore this kind of sensation. Maybe 5 years from now, the dance halls will be huge. Today, the reality is that you train your body with what you learn in class which is huge, and take it and make it small for the dance. It is harder to do the dance small. To translate the big things to a small movement is the most difficult. So the milonga has this intimate characteristic. In Europe, where sometimes the spaces are bigger, it doesn't make the dance more intimate. It makes it different. What is important and beautiful is to learn what you want to do. It is important not to lose the quality of intimacy within a space surrounded by other partners.
Dana joins us and gives us all kisses and hugs.
Q: And the third point?
Pablo: I forgot (much laughter)
Q:and teaching... do you enjoy it?
Dana: Yes. I enjoy it. There are a lot of people giving classes that shouldn't be, but it's not just giving classes. You must be able to teach. Many dancers are really good dancers, but I don't believe that they are great teachers. There aren't a lot of great teachers, because they don't study to become great teachers. Their lives aren't about serving as a teacher. To be a good teacher, you must know anatomy and understand how the body makes the movement happen. And teachers must have a love for what they are doing. So when we're talking about a teacher, we're not talking about teachers that get gratification from applause, or have their picture on a big poster. They have to feel happiness when the student learns. There are people who work very hard to become good teachers.. but not a lot.
Q: So a quality of a good teacher is to care for students?
Dana: The teachers have to understand how people function in their heads. And all the different cultures. Every culture has its own problems... physical and psychic. Everybody brings their own baggage or sense of self from their culture so when we are working with that person, we must have an understanding of that student's background. The teacher must also understand themselves.
Pablo: The Tango reflects what we don't want to see about ourselves in the other person. For example, if I dance with Ronnie, and it doesn't work I am seeing a reflection of my inability to lead in Ronnie and vice versa. But instead of understanding this reflection, we might say to each other, "You're not following" or "You're not leading well".
I might go to the milonga and hear something in the music and I want to express some feeling or movement but I can't because I am dancing with another person. So in dancing with any given partner, I have the opportunity to discover something new, that I haven't discovered with Dana. So each partner brings something different and it is an opportunity.
Dana: Pablo's way of expression is not common and that's because he enjoys dancing with most people. He really likes to explore what he can learn and experience with different people. That's what is lovely about dancing with different people and that quality of exploration is something this generation needs to do. It has to do with humility, lack of ego, and a desire to share. Just because you know the dance, there is always the opportunity to learn more. The professional dancers need to be reflective and careful of their own path because they can lose the love for what they are doing.
Q: The two of you dance with an aura of intimacy. Is that quality the most important to you?
Pablo: For me, it's what I'm looking for the most, but you can't achieve it with everyone. The intimacy has to come from both sides. Sometimes one part wants more than the other and they have to find a common ground. Sometimes you go into embrace but you don't feel anything... just the weight. It's not that it's bad. It just has its limits.
Dana: The toughest but the most rewarding search is going within oneself. If you don't go inside yourself, Tango is just like anything else. For instance, you can sit with a friend and have a coffee together and you can get to know each other through dialogue but not physical.
Q: Tango adds another quality?
Dana: The emotion comes before the intellect in Tango. An aroma, physical contact, musica.... We don't have to speak English, Japanese, or Spanish. It is not important. So the marvelous thing for me about Tango and what I think will last in history is that they come together... the cultures come together... doesn't depend on social class, intellect...these two things that are so important in today's society don't matter in Tango.
The embrace and how I present myself and the senses are important... and that's why it's so fabulous. I began speaking English two years ago, but I've been teaching Tango for 8 years and I have taught Tango all over the world. Obviously there's something that transcends the spoken language. Sometimes you go to a milonga, and you meet someone you might not say hello to on the street.
Q: But don't you think that the milonga has its own classism? Young blond women getting asked to dance more, regardless of their dance ability?
Pablo: I think the milonga reflects what is going on in society. In the old days, the young people had to stay on the sidelines. Now the young people can go out and do their own thing. Maybe the older generation feels bad about that.
Dana: That thing about blonds is inevitable... that's life. The goal should be - how can we be better people not just better dancers. People who are older must have more love and believe they can change the situation. There are some people like Pablo who dance with people who really want to dance. It doesn't matter how big, how old. etc. The most important thing to convey is your attitude... that you "like yourself" and people will notice and ask you to dance. If they don't ask the older lady in the first hour, you must not get tense. If you do, you will certainly not be asked to dance. Everybody needs this kind of attitude because there will always be young pretty girls... and even with the young women, they can go to a milonga and not dance as much as they want.
So in a milonga where you have all age ranges, the idea is to generate a group of people who know each other, and these people dance with each other to become more of a close group... more solidarity. For example, we go to a milonga together and we dance all night... but maybe Sebastian isn't dancing. I see this and will say, "I want to dance with Sebastian". Another night when I am not dancing, Sebastian will ask me. This is the way life is. We may want to dance with a particular person so - what do we do? My advice is to learn to dance better and when you dance with someone, open your heart and give something that maybe the pretty girls can't. There are pretty women who have only had 4 classes, and they will dance at the milonga but the really good dancers would rather dance with a unattractive person who dances really well.
Q: What are the qualities that a leader should strive for?
Pablo: They have to be very prepared for whatever happens. For example, if I dance with Ronnie, she surrenders her body to me and why should she surrender her body if I don't lead well. And the leader, as I mentioned before, is constantly receiving his own reflection from his partner.
The greatest challenge for the leader is to recognize what he doesn't know - what he needs. Typically he doesn't want to his partner to know what is missing but he must be aware. So he has to show all the good stuff to his partner and understand at the same time what is missing.
Dana: To lead, work with the partner, the space, the music. all at the same time.
Pablo: I think women are used to juggling many things at the same time. It's more difficult for men. When Dana wants to explain a movement to me, she will say, "Move this way with this music, feel my weight, relax your hand, stretch out your leg, relax your hips, flex your weighted leg. And don't forget to breath". (Everybody laughs and Dana gives Pablo a big smile)
Q: And the qualities for followers?
Dana: Sensitivity... being open and able to accept what the leader is proposing.... listening to the music and to propose their own part of the dance. To make the leader feel good, which is the most difficult part. Technically speaking, he proposes and I have to respond immediately. I need to learn how to follow but, afterwards, I must be willing to take risks. It is the difference between dancing and following.
Women want to learn what they think they don't know... the figures. I feel that they need to learn how their body functions when transferring weight and in connection with the leader.... what it feels like to be on axis... how to get to the next step in continuous contact with the leader and what to do with my free leg at the same time... that is Tango technically speaking.
Pablo: The follower doesn't need to learn the structure of the dance but it is important to Dana because she wants to learn everything.
If the follower knows a lot about the dance, she can become unhappy because the more she knows the more she expects. She thinks the most important thing is the figures. I think the more important thing is if she feels good in the embrace.
Dana's mother teaches yoga here. We started to take classes with her 6 years ago. Now, Stella is starting to change her technique by incorporating some of our work... to discover Tango movements within yoga. This works well because you work alone in yoga and can focus more on the body.
Q: What are the qualities of a good student?
Pablo: Someone who has their child part well explored.
Dana: The person who really tries to understand what is being proposed, asks questions, and works after class. I can always tell who is working hard.
Q: And going back to the concept about relating to different cultures, do foreign students have common traits?
Dana: German, Nordic - They tend to be shy and have stiff hips. Most of their motion is in the upper body. Also there are problems with ankles, flat feet, and shins. They are also not accustomed to using their joints.
Pablo: Asian - The men have more flexibility, mentally and physically, than the women. Maybe it's because the women were oppressed for so long. For instant, if I want a boleo, it is less work to make the man to do the boleo than the woman.
Dana: Americans - trust. When you want to learn, a student needs to trust. They always want proof that you are a good teacher... your credentials.
The French are like Argentines. They think they know everything. (Laughter)
Q: In Tango, describe some light bulb moments - when you feel excited?
Dana: When I practice, am at a milonga, or in an exhibition, I take off. Sometimes I die of pleasure. Sometimes I find myself in a big embrace.
Pablo: When I rehearse and discover something or, before, when I used to go to milongas more, something would be revealed.
In class, it's when I am able to convey something serious in a playful light manner. In exhibitions, it's the time before the applause... when it breaks the silence.
Q: How about perfect moments for the two of you?
Dana: All day - everyday but not when I'm tired. I need a vacation.
Pablo: When we communicate - cooking together - in bed (whhhhhhoooooaaa - and squeals from the spectators) - being silent together but breathing together ... and this is not always. We achieve this in one moment but it is the result of all the work before.
Dana: Being able to laugh together... especially when we fall.
Pablo: When I feel her weight and it is totally dependent on me - at that moment I feel her total trust and it doesn't matter if I make a mistake.
Q: Please describe Tango as a color with shape and movement.
Pablo: The form of our logo - round - when it goes in one direction something responds in another.
Circular movements - it's like big drops of color... radiating. The base is a plain color but the drops add color - suddenly a drop of red - a lot of dynamic because if it wasn't dynamic, it wouldn't shine.
Dana: I totally agree.
Q: Any last advice that you would like to give?
Pablo: Don't be afraid to dance... to sing... to paint. We carry these things inside ourselves. Everyone is born with these gifts. We can't say we don't like it. Everyone likes it! It's just that we are afraid. There's no particular age to explore, to discover movement. You have to stretch yourself. Movement is a natural expression. Anyone who teaches Tango does a favor for Tango and it's up to the student to respectfully obligate the teacher to learn more. It's wonderful that anyone is teaching Tango.
Dana: In this way... I agree... I thank people who teach Tango in the world but they need to keep learning.
(posted at 10:28 AM)
Thursday, March 13, 2008.
i wish i more often had the time to go grocery shopping in the middle of the day. when i do get away from work long enough to stop by the nearest Schnucks, i wander through the clean, brightly-lit aisles. i could stay for hours if time allowed. today i snuck away at 10:30AM to visit the grocery store across the street. the cars in the parking lot were sparse. the store was quiet and welcoming. i love examining the various veggie varieties and comparing Midwest produce prices to Texas produce prices. i love to spy on how ripe the bananas are- are they green or yellow? i love to count the different types of apples. i love to look at freshly cut pineapple cubes. i love to watch the bakery employees place freshly-baked goods in the display shelves. i love to spend 10 minutes deciding which kind of soup to have for lunch. i love to read the ingredients on the backs of boxes. i love to pretend as if i'm really going to buy another box of breakfast cereal. i love to look longingly at the loaves of artisan bread. i love to look at cookie cakes and the different brands of orange juice. i love to check out the new concoctions that people dream up in the frozen meal aisles. i love to people-watch and see what different customers put in their shopping carts. today in the 20 items or less express lane, the entire purchase of a tall, caucasian woman in front of me consisted of only 2 massive bottles of Sriracha sauce and a bunch of scallions. it made me grin.---
"Good writers define reality; bad ones merely restate it. A good writer turns fact into truth; a bad writer will, more often than not, accomplish the opposite." (edward albee)
- from Kristan
---
ever since i was old enough to write complete sentences in English, my mother encouraged journal-writing as a way to organize my thoughts and practice my language skills. my first occupational desire was to become an "Author" (i would pronounce it "Arthur"). my mom's advice was, writers write best when they write about what they know and what they have experienced.
it's been a long time since i revisited the idea of "being a writer." technology has launched a new category of writers. bloggers are rampant- amateurs and professionals alike. and sometimes even sound bites can't keep our interest.
sometimes we're forced to believe that in order to write, we need a consistent audience. sure, i'm guilty of checking my webstats daily. i'm guilty of wondering if people ever read my writing. but honestly, in the end, writing is therapeutic. i hope i can organize 7 years of sporadic, chaotic blogginess into something more maintainable. until then, my fragmented thoughts still serve a purpose in my life, even if i rarely remember to acknowledge how large of an impact this online journal has had on me.
(posted at 11:46 AM)
Tuesday, March 11, 2008.
i remember walking to the 7 Eleven and buying onigiri for an after-running snack. the hour-long bus ride home through the richest part of town, arriving in the poorest. coffeehouses with xiaowei. windy sandstorms, taking the train. bicycling and orange juice. fitting in, standing out. conversations in complex Mandarin about love and sex. tea and 包子every morning. reviewing vocabulary and writing a pageful of characters at 7AM. quiz immediately following. waking up early. the beijing air. cooking dumplings every night. bootleg movies and holding hands.
----
despite my struggles over the past few years (hehe), i still have a fixation with food. i think food plays an important role in relationships. i think it's important to be happy when you eat together. i think meals should be something you look forward to, whether it's a homemade peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwich or a fancy celebration dinner.
i think a lot about the scene in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, where they are eating Chinese food and Clementine talks about her annoyance with hair in the shower. Joel ponders, "Are we like couples you see in restaurants? Are we the dining dead?"
i know that it's inevitable that "dining" becomes routine; it's something that you have to do every day. but what about the magic of sitting at a table for two, people-watching, new-food-tasting, maybe touching, maybe talking, maybe silent, while still enjoying one of life's necessities?
----
when i live in one place again, i'm going to make more consistent times to take a bunch of cameras out to play. i'm looking for a partner in crime.
----
i looked for your name on the SXSW film roster.
----
(posted at 10:15 AM)
NYT's readers' comments on changing habits/attitudes with the changing gas prices.Nothing will change. The prices can go up and people will just keep on driving in some cases all the way to the poor house. The price for gasoline in Norway is three times that in the United States.... most of it in taxes. People still drive. Last summer while visiting with my sister in Massachusetts,my wife and I walked a lot and were the only ones on the sidewalks. One evening I was walking late at night and was questioned by the police as to what I was doing. They couldn't believe it when I said I was just walking. My sister,who complains bitterly about the price of gas,jumps in her car many times a day to "shop". She could walk to the shops for the few things she might need but it would never occur to her to do so. Most drive to an "exercise" center when all they need to do is walk around an hour a day.
— Nick O'Neill, Skien, Norway
America deserves this financial punishment. In 1973 small cars with high mileage to fuel ratios looked to be in everyone's future. But, oh no, the American public soon agreed with the automakers that bigger was still better. Then out came the SUVs and that ended our chance to become oil independent. Now we begin to pay the piper for our stupidity.
— william l fell, athens, ga
---
On Zuckerberg's keynote address at Austin's SXSWi.
And "what's on tap" at SXSWi.
(posted at 9:13 AM)
Monday, March 10, 2008.
it's one of those days that i spend about 7 hours browsing flickr and reading the news. but that's between me and you. --
"It's funny how much effort we invest into goodbyes. If only the rest of our interaction was equally energetic. We squeeze all of our conversation into the short-term ones. We squeeze all of our future longing into the long-term ones." - trey p.
--
Cooking Light names top 20 cities that best fit philosophy of eat smart, be fit, and live well.
--
reading up on snowboarding tips...
--
recently i've had a lot of dialogue with friends about moving away from austin.
here are more reasons not to.
--
always being away from home takes its toll. i can't wait for more regular weekends at home so i can start working on side projects again. the evolution of web development amazes me. jon is still trying to come up with our million dollar idea of a partnership.
(posted at 4:22 PM)
the sunshine returns in the cold, tasteless midwest. i balance between missouri and illinois, and the heat of my indecision blows across the sidewalk like last week's storm. the lukewarm ice melts my insecurities, and they pool at your feet. you sidestep drowning with a staccato beat,here. i. am. here. i. am. defying defeat.
phonecam in st. louis.
(posted at 11:23 AM)
"我能想到最浪漫的事就是和你一起慢慢變老"
.
if you can't read the characters,
"wo neng xiang dao zui lang man de shi
jiu shi he ni yi qi man man bian lao"
.
if you don't know mandarin,
"the most romantic thing i can think of...
is to grow old by your side"
(posted at 11:13 AM)
Tuesday, March 04, 2008.
global art project: http://www.global-art.org/about/projectdescription.html
i was heartbroken when emy and aydee told me that bananas are full of carbs. i think i can officially attribute my wider waistline to the fact that i eat twice the carbs i'm supposed to.
---
snowboarding is perhaps the most exciting sport i've ever tried. i felt like i was on a flying hoverboard. even riding the ski lift was exhilirating (is that sad?). as a side note... falling 50 times and getting back up again is great exercise.
---
in Science News, Gene That Can Block The Spread Of HIV Discovered.
---
cameras...
holga/diana?
olympus pen ee
(posted at 12:01 PM)
Monday, March 03, 2008.
it's almost spring, can you hear it?"i'm searching for a sound that sounds soft and warm and comfortable
no matter how you turn up the volume" - april of kitchenweb
"learning to love you more" #3
(posted at 9:31 PM)
Sunday, March 02, 2008.
snow falling outside our windows this morning. if only...
(posted at 11:41 PM)